Mandy Schumaker

PERFORMANCE COACH, TRAINER AND SPEAKER

Management

Do You Take The “No Excuses” Approach?

by Leave a Comment

We have forty million reasons for failure, but not a single excuse.
Rudyard Kipling

“I’m too busy right now”, “Next year is probably a better time to start”, “I need to wait until the kids get settled into school”, “I need to wait until after the holidays”, “It was just really crazy last week, and I couldn’t get it done” “Are you kidding me, I can’t afford that now.”

Sound familiar? These are often the excuses we tell ourselves in our business. Even when we have the very best intentions to get more clients, build our business, attend more networking events, write a book, start a blog or newsletter, or start a new product.

I’m so surprised how often people stop themselves from doing something they say they REALLY want to do in their lives or business by using excuses. And what it boils down to is the INNER SELF DOUBT that consistently allows people who SAY they want more clients or to make more money in their business to question, over think and become unwilling to take the steps or do the work that can create the result. And it’s that same inner self-doubt that creates the excuses that come up, “I don’t know how to sell”, “I can’t afford that now”, and “I’m not sure that’s right for MY business.”

This inner self-doubt, the questioning everything, and the not taking serious ACTION when the solution shows up, all comes down to one thing that’s called…SELF SABOTAGE.

You need to realize that THE limitation around getting to the next level in your business is created by your own mindset. Once you realize that, you can change your perspective, stop using excuses and make the commitment to “just go for it”.

Here’s a process that I’ve seen work with myself and in my clients recently:

  • They make a firm decision (to succeed, to attend something, to write that book, buy something)
  • They stop over thinking and start looking at what’s in front of them in terms of solutions and possibilities
  • They spend time quieting the inner critic and the relentless self doubt
  • They are totally committed and they get very creative in looking at different ways of making it happen
  • They take ACTION in spite of the fear and self doubt

Once you make the decision to succeed, it’s time to commit to doing whatever it takes to make it happen.

Whatever it takes.

YOUR ASSIGNMENT:

Answer this question: What is it that you are wanting to do that you’re stopping yourself with excuses or money or time?

Make a list-be honest with yourself and if you see yourself doing this very thing…

Answer this question: How BADLY do you want this thing, whatever it is?

If it’s something you want really badly, then you need to approach it as a life or death situation. Shut all the “back doors” and “ways out”, stop with the excuses and start taking bold, decisive action towards what you say you want in your business or your life. It’s about saying YES to what’s possible for you, saying YES to all the opportunities that are before you.

Nothing is impossible; there are ways that lead to everything, and if we had sufficient will we should always have sufficient means. It is often merely for an excuse that we say things are impossible.
Francois La Rochefoucauld

So, What Do You Value?

by Leave a Comment

“Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and VALUES are in balance”

Brian Tracy

One of the most important things you can do for yourself and your business is to get clear on your values. This not only allows you to understand the points on your internal compass, it also motivates you to head towards them! They can be used as a framework for which all decisions you might make can be held up against for consideration.

Most of us take a lifetime to understand who we are. Through life’s experiences, some unpleasant, we gradually come to know what we value, what we believe and what we have for gifts and skills to make a difference in the world.

Unless we know ourselves and understand our values, we become attached to what lures us in, and mere objects of other people’s will. We can become outer-directed and lost inside. We can easily be attracted to money, power, control and prestige. The chase for these things often leaves us feeling empty and yearning for something more.

The three most important rules to understand with values are these:

1-There are no right or wrong values. Only right or wrong for the individual. Your values are right for you and mine are right for me. It’s highly unlikely any two people will have exactly the same values because there are an infinite number of permutations.

2-Only you can determine which values are most important for you, someone else cannot determine your values.

3-If somebody’s values do appear to be blatantly wrong-refer back to rule #1

Assignment

Make a list of your values. You might want to take a look at a list of possible values to help you get started.

1-Circle the key values

2-Now identify your top five. Don’t try to override your gut feelings with an internal conversation that goes something along the lines of : “I suppose I should really have family at number one, otherwise the wife/husband/kids will kill me.”

3-Examine these top 5 values by responding to these questions:

  • Are you living out these 5 values? In your family? In your business? In your community?
  • How are you doing with these values? Very well, or not so well?
  • Where are you living out of alignment with your values?
  • If these values were missing from your life, how important would that be to you?

Value-centered living or leadership is acting on our beliefs and our values. When we use our values to make decisions or help us lead our business or lives, we become inner-directed and outwardly motivated.

What Does “Doing Better” Really Mean?

by Leave a Comment

This time of year, I love reading some of the great commencement speeches given by writers, politicians, poets, journalists, etc.  Many of them are so inspirational and motivating.  Anyone in leadership should really take the time to read some of these speeches, as they remind us of the possibilities,  innovation and future ideas of our organizations and businesses.

This year, Anna Quindlen‘s commencement speech at Grinnell College was fabulous.  Quindlen, author and columnist at Newsweek, spoke to graduates about a variety of things from the economy,  to facing fear, to being real.  But the thing that struck me the most was her reference to the traditional belief of parents who want their children to “do better” than they had.   Many believe that just isn’t going to happen for this next generation.

While Generation Y‘s are not looking for the SUV’s and McMansions of the 80’s, Quindlen points out that perhaps this is a moment to consider what “doing better” really means and she does a fine job of redefining it.

  As Quindlen so eloquently stated, …

If you are part of the first generation of Americans who genuinely see race and ethnicity as attributes, not stereotypes, will you not have done better than we did? If you are part of the first generation of Americans with a clear understanding that gay men and lesbians are entitled to be full citizens of this country with all its rights, will you not have done better than we did? If you are part of the first generation of Americans who assume women merit full equality instead of grudging acceptance, will you not have done better than we did? And on a more personal level, if you are part of the generation that ditches the 80-hour work week, and returns to a sane investment in your professional life, the first generation in which young women no longer agonize over how to balance work and family, and young men stop thinking they will balance work and family by getting married, won’t you have done better than we did?

See the video below to hear Part I of the speech.  Let me know your thoughts and how it changes your perception of “doing better”.  You can catch Part II at https://youtu.be/RkBKcxOdqJo

Feeling Stuck? Five Tips To Get Yourself Unstuck And Back On Track

by Leave a Comment

It happens to all of us at varying times.  We get stuck.  We know what we “want” to be doing, or where we “should” be going, or what we “ought” to be achieving.  But something is holding us back between what we desire and where we are in our job, business, or life.  As a leadership coach, I often work with clients who are stuck. Stuck in their current job or position.  Stuck in a business they don’t find fun or fulfilling anymore. Perhaps they’ve gotten caught up in the details and have lost sight of their intended vision or outcome.  Or perhaps they are unable to focus on what they really want because they have a fear of the unknown, or a loss of confidence.  Often times they just feel plain overwhelmed and don’t know where to start and can’t make a decision.  Whatever the reason, it’s painful, frustrating and downright depressing to be stuck. 

If you are a leader or business owner, being stuck also has an impact on our employees and organizations.  New ideas, projects and innovation within our organizations are jeapordized.  Your direct reports feel frustrated that things are not moving forward and there is probably a loss of trust and respect.  Productivity and profitability are compromised and customers may start to lose interest and patience with your products and services.

Again, we all get stuck at different times of our lives but what’s most important is how we choose to move through what’s keeping us stuck.  After working over the years, with clients who have found themselves stuck in a job or business,  I have found the five following tips help get most people unstuck and moving toward their goal and vision.

1) Consider playing a bigger game.  Perhaps your goal is too small and you are bored, which if the case, will clearly not motivate you to take action and move forward.  Look at your vision or goal…and double it!

2) Perhaps your goal is too large and you need to play a smaller game.  If your goal is too big, you could easily get overwhelmed and stuck in a rut.  So either set a smaller goal, or set milestones along the way and target those.

3) Do the opposite. What might happen if you started doing the opposite of what you’ve been doing to help move yourself forward, or reach your goal?  Sometimes taking a 180 or even a 90 degree turn is what’s needed to help move you along.

4) Ask yourself:  Is this really the goal I want, or is this a “should” goal.  So often I ask my clients this question when they are stuck and many, many times it’s a “should” goal.  Not something that’s coming from your heart.  Fill in the blank and answer the question, “If I do _______________, am I doing it to make ME happy or just to make someone else happy?”

5) Identify your top five values.  This is a very helpful exercise in getting clear on what values in your life are most important to you.  Only then can you authentically move forward towards a goal or objective that clearly expresses your value(s).  Working with a coach or mentor is an excellent way to identify your value list, which helps create the cornerstones for any change, movement, goal or objective you hope to achieve.

I would really welcome your comments  on this subject.  If you’ve found a successful way in helping get yourself unstuck,  I would love to hear from you.  In the meantime, if any of this post resonates with you and you’d like to have some support on getting yourself unstuck,  please feel free to call me at 207-653-6977.

Related articles

How Are Your Customers Feeling?

by Leave a Comment

Keeping customers in painLast week I ended up in the emergency room with acute appendicitis.  I had had a CAT scan in the late afternoon which showed some fluid around the appendix and there was some concern that it  might burst.   My doctor sent me immediately to the emergency room with my CAT scan CD in hand, saying, “We’ll call and let them know you are coming-hopefully that will speed things up.”   Upon arrival I was quickly seen by the triage nurse who then sent me back out in the waiting room, saying, “Have a seat, we’ll be with you in a few minutes”.  There were nearly 20 people in the waiting room and very quickly I overheard someone say outloud, “I’ve been here for over two hours, when can I see a doctor?”.  At that point, I panicked.  My abdomen really hurt at this point, I had a fever and chills.  Sitting was the most uncomfortable position for me and I started to worry that my appendix might rupture, since I had been in pain for over four days.

Over two hours went by.  During that time a couple of nurses came out and took a patient or two back into the emergency room.  But when any hospital personnel came into the large waiting room, they were very careful not to meet anyone’s eye, lest they be asked, “when will a doctor see me?”  No one ever came through the room to ask if we needed anything, blankets, water, pillows-nothing.  Now I know emergency rooms can be filled with people who may  not be having a medical emergency. And often times, doctors send their patients there after hours when waiting until the next morning to see someone, would probably have been okay.  But a patient is a patient.  A customer is a customer.  I know the hospital personnel had the best intentions, but it occurred to me that every doctor, nurse and hospital administrator should have to sit in one of their waiting room chairs for two and half hours with an acute pain in their belly, shivering with chills and a fever, and no information.

This made me wonder, how are we, as leaders and business people,  treating our customers?   Are we giving them the information they need along the way, so they know where we/they are in the process?  Do we have the courage to look them in the eyes when we are clearly at capacity and things aren’t running as smoothly as we’d like?  Or do we shirk around and keep our eyes to the floor so we don’t have to engage in a tough conversation?  Are we proactive in asking them what would be helpful to them at that moment?    Where are the gaps,  from our customer’s perspective,  in our good intentions?

I’m not talking about customer surveys and focus groups to get at this stuff.  I’m talking about meeting our customer eyeball to eyeball and finding out if what they need and communicating with them every step of the way.  What are the questions on their minds?  Where do we drop the ball in the process?  Whether we are a Fortune 500 company or a solopreneur, it’s important that we know how our customers feel-at any given moment.  So, I invite you put yourself in your customer’s shoes and walk through the process in your business.  Where are the gaps?  Where does it feel uncomfortable, unclear or even scary?   Are you making your customers feel more comfortable?  Or are you keeping them in pain?

Is Procrastination Prohibiting You From Playing A Bigger Game?

by Leave a Comment

Procrastination.  We all suffer from it at various times.  Waiting to start that big project. Waiting to do some household chore. Waiting to have a difficult conversation with an employee, colleague or family member. Most of the time  we eventually work our way through it and get the things on our list done.

But the procrastination I find most concerning  and detrimental is the behavior that gets in the way of a bigger vision.  The clients I work with are high performing people.  They have talents and gifts to offer the world.  They know deep down inside that there is a bigger game to play, a bigger vision for their lives.   My job is to support them in that vision and help them get there.  Yet one of the common traits among my clients is that they often let procrastination get in the way of moving forward.  There is an underlying fear of giving up something they are doing now  in order to catch the bigger brass ring.  It’s that chasm between what we know and what is possible.

Procrastination technically refers to the avoidance of a specific task or work which needs to be accomplished.  But this technical explanation doesn’t begin to capture the emotions triggered by the word.  If your are suffering from procrastination issues,  its important to analyze those situations where your work or project  is not  being completed. Perhaps it’s one of the following reasons:

1. Lack of Relevance – If something is neither relevant nor meaningful to you personally, it may be difficult to get motivated to even begin.  It’s important to determine if the goal, project, task is meaningful you.  Working with either a coach or mentor, it’s important to dig deep to determine whether what you are avoiding is indeed  relevant to you and your bigger vision.  If the answer is it’s not, then let it go, get it off your list and figure out what is important.

2. Acceptance of Another’s Goals – Has a project been imposed or assigned to you by someone else?  Maybe it is not consistent with your own interests,  or values.   If this is the case, you  will probably get it done eventually — you may be “required” to get it done.  But it doesn’t have to become part of your goal or vision.

3. Perfectionism-If you feel everything needs to be perfect before you can start a project, you may stay stuck for a very long time.  I have clients who feel they need to have their website up and running before they can talk to a potential client, or they have to have a completely free schedule to start their book,  or they have to have all of the right managers in place before they start working on team development.  Certainly having a plan and timeline in place for each of these scenarios is helpful, but being able to see that “done is better than perfect” can help you start taking some small steps forward.

4. Fear-Many people fear taking steps that move them forward towards their vision or dream, because it means letting go of some of the things they are doing today.  If, for example, someone wants to play on a bigger field, it may require giving up certain things they are doing today — things that bring in money or keep them at a certain status.  It’s giving up what is familiar now for much greater possibilities down the road.  By fully embracing your bigger vision, breaking down the steps and projects into bite-size pieces and continuing to hold that vision  for yourself, can help lower the anxiety and actually get started.

5. Ambiguity-Are you unclear what is expected from a task, project or field work that has been assigned to you?  This can be another roadblock to procrastinating behavior.  By asking the pertinent questions upfront, you can be more clear as to what is expected.

6. Time Management- How are your time management skills?  Working with a coach who can put you through an assessment or two around this area can quickly help you determine where you are with time management.  By focusing on some of the areas that may  play into your procrastination issues and taking some steps to improve them, could greatly improve your productivity.

7. Can’t Say No- Many times people suffer from procrastination because there is too much on their plate.  Have you been unable to say “no” to others and then found yourself with so many projects you have become paralyzed?   Look at everything on your plate and prioritize it.  What can go, what should stay?  Which items  move you towards your bigger vision and which ones are sucking the life out of you?  These are important questions to ask when sorting through all the various projects, tasks and commitments that you are currently facing.

If fear is holding you back from a bigger vision or playing bigger in the world, I would like to speak with you.  As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “we must do the thing we fear the most”.

I would like to hear your comments on this post.  Or if something resonated with you, please feel free to contact me at 207-653-6977 or mandy@mandyschumaker.com to continue the conversation.

Related articles
Enhanced by Zemanta